Personal Growth

The Run Down

Sorry, have to explain what happened. It makes all future posts easier and gets the negatives out of the way.



Together for one year before moving to Australia.


Just the cheating, multiple ex’s. I asked her to promise me to never contact anyone she’d ever had sex with. Else it was over. Discovered she had a video camera she used to record sex tapes to post online. Told me she’d had 60+ previous sexual partners and couldn’t remember their names.


I didn’t pay enough attention to her. So even surrounded by her family, friends, and myself she still felt lonely.


  • June – Moved into Trink st
    • she was fine during this period, cleaned up after herself and was fairly normal
  • November – Took over lease


  • January – Shanni and Jamie move in
  • July – Bought Holden SV6
  • August – Trip to NZ
  • December – Her friend visits for Christmas
    • Get cats, swimming pool, Christmas tree
    • Thinking about leaving
    • Car deregistered


  • June – Lost my job
    • She forgot to set her alarm, and someone turned off mine. Like off off.
  • November – Moved house – Just us
  • December – Made redundant breakdown. Because of financial doom
    • Girlfriend starts love bombing New boyfriend


  • April – Trip to Bali
  • May – Tells me she’s leaving me because she wants to go home, doesn’t want me to come.
    • Checked her social media, haha she must have thought it was only Facebook I checked. She had written odd stuff on there that wouldn’t have made sense to him, more like they were written for me, just to hurt me. I feel like she had chosen one of the ugliest guys, whos ever been interested in her, just to hurt me. Probably not, she just realised he’s pretty desperate and will be easy to control. Imagine PedoTroll, best description I can come up with. Embarrasing for me that I had sex with someone, who had sex with someone, that looks like that. Yes, I am that shallow, sorry not sorry.
  • July – Moves to NZ

“He’s nothing like you” she said when I suggested he must be codependent like me. Else he’s a sociopath like her.

Sorry he’s into PS4, drinking and electronics. Sorry mate your fucked. You deserve her.

Haha I wanted her to clean up after herself, set some goals and budget, before planning the wedding. PedoTrolls ideas;

Step 1 Come to Melbourne

Step 2 Have sex with me

Step 3 step 2 again

She’d told me she cheated on her ex with 6 different guys, because wait for it, he was abusive and never wanted to go out and do anything. HE HAD AGORAPHOBIA!! and only ever got angry at her over the abortion.

From the very beginning, she knew I drank a lot and had a problem with anxiety and depression, I made my needs clear. She drank just as much as me. She was unhappy, she tried to compensate by overeating and shopping for clothes. Oh, also chatting up multiple other men. Sex made her happy.

When I left for Australia I specifically mentioned mess and cheating. She agreed to make an effort. I didn’t realize that meant making an effort to get worse and make me live under some of the worst conditions I’ve ever seen. And also treat me with a complete lack of respect.

Anytime I had an opinion on anything to do with the home life I was always shot down, given the silent treatment and passive aggressively abused. If I had said anything about any issue or asked for anything it was always either forgotten about, done poorly, or the issue was made worse.

I know she didn’t forget to open my mail. Else why would she open some things, like the engagement ring, put in on and take photos with it and some she opened and threw away?
Reregistering my car cost around 1600 all up.

She knew how much effort I put into our lawn. When I asked her to mow it for me, the only time in two years she did, she mowed over the pop-up sprinkler, so they were on, and it is located right next to the fence, so extremely hard to do by accident.

She always went on about how I didn’t remember the names of her workmates or minute details about her job, she knew nothing about my job, she knew none of their names and she didn’t really understand what I did. Even though we’d spoken for hours about it.

I wanted a real Christmas tree, she wanted a fake one. End of conversation, so I return home to a fake tree. The decorations were terrible, not anything like what I would have chosen.

I asked her to keep my side of the room tidy, just for me. So she filled it with shoes, bags, and dirty laundry.

I asked her not to speak to anyone she’d had sex with in the past, and no more online sex. She promised, a promise means everything to me. So I looked at her social media maybe 6 times over those 3 years, extremely hurt to find she’s still talking to guys she loved but were unavailable, and sex roleplaying sometimes more than 10 guys at a time.

There was no foreplay from her, anytime I asked, she would do things I didn’t like, I would have to ask her to please stop. Eventually, I stopped asking for, or initiating foreplay, sometimes it was quite painful

Instead of asking for sex, she would sit there and play with herself while I was distracted, doing things like playing PS4, which she knew I did when we started dating. The few times she asked for something while I was playing, I stopped what I was doing.

She didn’t even mention to me getting a pool or where she would put it. So destroyed half of the lawn I’d spent around $600 and multiple days off restoring.

She blamed everyone, for anything you can possibly imagine. Those aren’t my dishes, those aren’t my dirty clothes, that isn’t my food on the floor. I thought she was nuts.

She stopeed taking contraception last year. Trying to baby me up, just like her ex. Good thing I was taking steroids.

She took every opportunity to make me feel terrible like I wasn’t good enough.

Why would I stay with her? The sex was terrible. I had to remind her to have a shower because I could smell her from 3m away.

She made me affraid to go out in public with her.

She was boring. Not in the normal sense. She just didn’t give two fucks about what you had to say. And it was obvious. Everything was about her.

She was lazy. I would clean up the house before I left for work. I’d return home to cat shit, dirty dishes, food on the floor, and dirty washing left wearever it was convienient for her. She didn’t give two fucks.

In the end after blaming everything on other flatmates. After moving in together she could only blame things on me. At work she was blaming her stores failure on assistant managers and then before being performance managed out of her job, blames Australia. “Oh shit time to gap it back to NZ. Before I have to accept the reality that I’m responsible for my own life.”

The cruelty of the smile.

Made me think I was crazy.

Lied to her friends and family about why she was returning. Told them I was an abusive alcoholic, and she’d met someone amazing. lol. She drinks just as much as I do. And I’ve never abused her. Ahh he’s exactly like me but uglier. Like scarily similar. Pretty much a dopple ganger,.. but uglier. All the same hobbies, it’s crazy. Interested in ALL the same things. Just WOW. To say on social media that you’d met your soul mate two weeks after leaving your fiance. Haha, shes crazy. That is crazy. To admit cheating on your partner on social media is crazy. Just WOW. Love of her life, soul mate. This guy must be an idiot.

She can’t even feed a cat. Or clean up a cats poo. What are her children going to end up like? I’m hoping they’ll be taken away. At least they won’t be mine.

The only reason she could come up with was, “I was lonely”, sorry for only being available 24/7. She said she felt like she couldn’t talk to me. Haha everything she said to this other guy, was a lie. Ahh yea if you’d lied to me, I would have known. So she couldn’t really talk to me.

All she’s looking for is D and money. Now she’s home, she’s got D and her Dad provides the money. She can continue the lie, and make everyone believe it was all my fault.

If PedoTroll hadn’t said such nasty things about me, I’d be worried about him. If she treated him half as bad as she treated me, he’d be a guaranteed suicide. Considering the lengths she goes to, to try and ruin your life, has been getting more cruel with time. And the fact that PedoTroll has stolen(sorry he was manipulated into that by her, but still, bro code!!, Oh lol, that doesn’t exist in his home country) someone’s fiancee, and agreed to father her children. Lol they’re both bat shit crazy.

( She had posted on her Instagram about her goal of having children in 18 months; after she’d ended it with me(posted May 20th). That gives her enough time in a new job to get maternity leave… I’m not making this shit up!!)



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